So, you may or may not have noticed I didn’t have any new posts last week. I granted myself a little break. It was a busy and stressful week at work, and I also had some family stresses weighing pretty heavily on my mind as well. By the time I got to thinking about what I wanted to go up on the blog…it just felt like another chore I had to get out of my hair.
And this is supposed to be fun, so it was time to take a short breather.
I think it did me quite a bit of good. I put a lot of unnecessary pressure on myself about the success of this blog, but first and foremost, it’s supposed to be fun. So I’m trying to keep that goal in mind while writing going forward–just have a little fun!
I’ve also been doing a little thinking about the direction I want this blog to go. I’ve written about a little bit of everything these past couple of months, trying to figure out where my strengths and interests lie. And I think they’re in complaining.
I’m kidding. Mostly.
What I mean is, the words flow most freely and easily when I’m either A) on a rant or B) doling out a little Mom Wisdom/ Snark.
Today I want to hit you with a little Mom Wisdom on Birth Plans. When I was pregnant, I devoured everything I could online about pregnancy. Blogs, message boards, Facebook pages, and one thing that frequently came up was The Birth Plan.
Here’s my thoughts about that. Birth Plans are…okay. By all means, write one out. Put down the things you want to happen, and list the things you don’t want to happen.
Now take that paper. Crumple it up.
Set it on fire.
Then stomp (or cry) on the ashes.
Because here’s the thing, sweet cheeks. You’re (basically) a parent now, and life is pretty much NEVER going to go according to plan ever again.
Forgive me for being a little over dramatic. Things not going to plan…it’s not necessarily a bad thing. The past 18 months or so of parenting my daughter has taught me VOLUMES on letting go and accepting that not everything is within my control.
I had a birth plan. I wrote it out. I put a moderate amount of effort into it.
Literally nothing went according to plan. Except for getting an epidural (hallelujah!) and getting a pretty awesome baby at the end of it all. By all means, still make a birth plan, but be prepared for that plan to change. Actually, think of it more as a wish list than a plan, because it is very likely that things will change. Whether it’s a small detail, like keeping lights low and the atmosphere quiet, or a big deal, like an unplanned c-section. It’s all within the realm of possibilities.
The birth of my daughter was my first and maybe most important lesson in motherhood. That lesson is: things rarely go as planned, and that’s okay. Sometimes, you’ve just got to do whatever gets you through those tough moments.
For me, that was electing for a c-section after being induced and not progressing after over twenty hours in the hospital. It was giving my daughter a bottle because breastfeeding was sheer agony and further wrecked my fragile psyche that was already being ravaged by those post-pregnancy hormones. It was letting her sleep in my arms when some said I’d spoil her. It was also letting her cry in her bed for a few minutes because I just needed a break and she desperately needed to sleep.
You can have the best intentions when entering parenthood, but those intentions are quickly thrown aside once you’re really in it. Once the reality hits you that you are responsible for the care and well-being of this precious little person, you’ll literally do anything if you think it will make them happy or take away their pain. And that’s what you do.
You just do.
What’s the best advice you’d give to a parent-to-be, or the best advice you received? What’s one thing you want to do as a parent? Did your birth go as planned…or not at all? Share your stories in the comments!